Posted on November 17th, 2007 by Elliott
I can’t be completely sure what it is, but for some reason there are more than a couple serial killers that just, well, make me all puffy down there. Maybe it’s because danger is inherently sexy. I mean, who doesn’t love knife fights and bareback meth gangbangs, right? So I’ve decided to do a little series of serial killers that can snap my bean.
Today’s, er, lady killer: Gary Heidnik
More about Garykins, after the jump!
Okay, so admittedly a little scary looking, but that can be hot, no? Just imagine being on the receiving end of that penetrating, soulless stare! Of course, it’ll probably just end in carnage - or, more specifically, being chained up in Heidnik’s basement so he can sodomize and electrocute you only to grind you up in dog food to feed to his other captives, which is just one of the many ways Garykins got his kicks. Of course, like any sensible person, when caught Heidnik’s defense was that the brutalized women chained up in pits in his basement were there when he moved in. Whooops! That sounds like a sitcom premise if I ever heard one! Oh the hilarity that ensues when a wacky violent psychopath moves into a house with naked women locked in the basement. When he was convicted and sentenced to the electric chair, Heidnik said he was glad because the execution of an innocent man would surely end the death penalty. That Heidnik, always a kidder.
Perhaps it’s just his fleeting resemblance to Vincent Gallo that I find alluring?
Next up on Serial Killers I Would Totally Do: Jeffy Dahmer! Cannibalizing Asian twinks never looked so good.
RSS Subscribe
Follow on Twitter
Facebook
November 18th, 2007 at 11:46 am
You should look into hot assassins while you’re at it. Especially the ones who poison aged queens in an opera box.
[reply this comment]
November 20th, 2007 at 10:20 am
I so thought Andrew Cunanan was sort of cute, but I can’t get past the Killing Versace. Check out Matt Wolf’s video “I feel love” (2004)
http://mattwolf.info/love/index.html
[reply this comment]