Posted on May 7th, 2008 by Colin
This last weekend I was privileged enough to see Iron Man. This is the outfit I wore.
So sexy, right? All my yoga and kefir-eating have finally paid off as I get to show off my legs in yellow tight spandex in their full muscular glory while I watch a movie in the dark. Obviously, I am expecting a Times Square circa 1986 porno theater crowd for opening weekend of Iron Man, and, unless I dress the role, how else can I expect to receive oral sex from a stranger sitting next to me while they stop to occasionally whisper in my ear, “Oh, Tony Stark, I want you in me.” These things happen, people. These things happen in our world.
On a similar topic, the topic being promiscuous sex with male prostitutes in public scenarios, I still can’t stop thinking about the old Robert Downey Jr. The one that gets arrested for drug charges and causes trouble. It may just be because Less Than Zero has been on TV a lot recently. There’s really something magical about watching Downey Jr. 20 years younger on a drug binge puking up everything inside of him while Jami Gertz holds his head over the toiler then grow old and make a movie where he’s a steamy, muscled engineer.
You can see why people hire me and my outfit for Tony Stark role play fantasies these days, right? I mean, who doesn’t dream about getting with a buff man in a tank top who knows how to work with hard materials? Especially one in a position of power in the military!
And while these new trends in sex symbol imagery may be good for men like me of thicker physique and facial hair, I kind of miss the old Robert Downey Jr. star persona a little bit. Where’s the man caught drunk driving while in possession of heroine I’ve grown familiar with while growing up?
Whether or not I totally understand Robert Downey Jr.’s transformation from fucked up, disillusioned youth to hunky hero cum weapons engineer, at least his forlorn, lovesick waif phase (via Elton John’s “I Want Love”) is over.
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May 7th, 2008 at 8:43 pm
Actually your costume and look more closely resemble the Tony Stark in the inaugural Marvel issue of “Iron Man”. In those days he was only a “playboy millionaire” (who knew for billions back then!) and he sported the same cheesy mustache. And definitely more about the bold primary colors of your outfit.
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