So this last weekend was a big movie weekend for me. Not only did I see Sex and the City but I also saw a superior but still awful movie called The Strangers. I went in with fairly high hopes for a trashy, fun horror movie, but unfortunately its only redeeming factor was that you get to see [SPOILER ALERT, ASSHOLES!!!] Liv Tyler get gutted like a fish. Reasons why the movie failed:

• Scott Speedman does not get naked.
• The killers were totally unexplained. While I realize that was the point that was supposed to make them scary, they would be WAY scarier if they were made out to be crazed meth addicts. I mean… really if you’re out on a killing spree at 5am I have a feeling you had a date with Tina that night, and the faces of meth are terrifying (with the exception of the one lady who just turns into Helena Bonham Carter from Harry Potter). Basically I never understood why they had what seemed to be super powers and secret access to any room in the house.
• Overuse of the gimmick where the killer lurks in the background of the mise en scene unbeknownst to the protagonist on screen.
• The masks the killers wore that concealed their identities the entire movie just weren’s scary.

And on that note, I had some ideas for some masks the killers could wear that would definately make the movie 3.7 times more terrifying (as confirmed by my anecdotal market research of friends via Gchat).

One Response to “When Celebrities Get Gutted”

1. Japhy Grant Says:
   June 4th, 2008 at 12:02 pm

   All this did was make me excited for a serial killer film about a meth addict. Like Reefer Madness, but with axes and meth labs and people who see bugs crawling everywhere. Sign me up.

   [reply this comment]

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