Last night I was watching Logo. Because it’s a homosexual station and I am a homosexual. Also, the televised version of Angels in America was on, and I think Tony Kushner’s gay fantasia is one of the most important pieces of theater in the past century. I can tell that Logo is a station for me because it shows the following types of ads during the commericial breaks:

I feel so represented!!1!!1! Guys from Spain are always soooo interesting. If I had a “type,” I would say my “type” is “interesting.”

Point is some in house ad came on with Varla Jean Merman where she talks about how it’s National Drag Month and that I should care for some reason. First I was offended, because in my head I thought it was February and that Logo was trying to steal Black History Month for drag queens/kings. Then my acid flashback ceased, and I realized it’s January and calmed down. While I don’t really think drag merits a “history month” and would be happier to see a National Transpeople’s Month, it did get me thinking — if I were to do drag what would my drag name be?

For porn, I’ve already decided that the funniest porn name possible is Daikon Radish. For one it’s a vegetable and lacks any overt innuendo, but when you think about it it’s basically a large dildo that is the size of something you’d see someone at The Eagle sit down on.  Also, it’s healthy! Also a title screen that scrolled text along the lines of “Slutty Summer 8: One Blew His Wad Over the Cuckoo’s Nest starring Daikon Radish” is super funny to me. Best. Porn. Name. Ever.

But if I was to do drag? I’m thinking maybe Babooshka. Because of the following video (just wait for it, you’ll see why):

Kate Bush is such a genius that she both can create a modern dance where a cello represents the “husband” in the song and that babooshka no longer means a Russian grandmother, but rather a weird Caligula inspired sex kitten with crazy back lighting. Basically I think if I did drag I would want to represent the same sort of inane, asynchronous ethic.

But really, what would my drag name be?

10 Responses to “National Drag Month Everyone”

1. Keeez Says:
   January 13th, 2009 at 8:59 am

   Krystal Sprinkles/Twinkles?
   Paula Balls?
   Ms. Potty Mouth?
   Shaquille?
   Lady Geocities?

   [reply this comment]

2. Josh Says:
   January 13th, 2009 at 9:00 am

   Best Drag name I heard this weekend was Tia Sells – for an empowered HIV+ Queen

   [reply this comment]

3. kevin Says:
   January 13th, 2009 at 5:26 pm

   Sometimes I think there may be a very fine line between Kate Bush and “The Cheetah Lady” and the only thing separating them is production value.

   [reply this comment]

   Colin reply on January 14, 2009:

   I think you misunderstand. Kate Bush makes A-R-T. The Cheetah Lady just makes no sense and frightens tweens.

4. Anony Moose Says:
   January 13th, 2009 at 7:28 pm

   Jorge Suxalott (drag king)
   Pi Bea Argh (drag king)

   Suga Titz
   Delia Pecka
   Kegela Dirtstar
   Puta Barata
   O’lestra
   Entrega Confacilidad
   Olivia Diddles
   Sasha LaFierce
   Latashashaniquafunquitabashibarashaba Jones

   [reply this comment]

5. Anony Moose Says:
   January 13th, 2009 at 8:11 pm

   I would like to change Kegela’s name to Keegela Dewarstah because it makes her sound black, jewish, and elegant like a smooth whiskey.

   [reply this comment]

6. Maribellum Says:
   January 14th, 2009 at 12:32 am

   Both of these videos gave me a raging boner. Yup. I wanna babooshka all over that latin guy’s face.
   I think your drag name should be Totes Fantastique.

   [reply this comment]

   Colin reply on January 14, 2009:

   Babooshka has a sword. She’s a warrior. No grandmas here. So amazing.

7. Vagenius Says:
   January 20th, 2009 at 11:01 am

   You LOVE Babooshka!

   Also, are gay men prohibited from wearing sleeved tops in Albuquerque?

   [reply this comment]

8. hidden Says:
   January 3rd, 2010 at 2:49 pm

   whats the ribbon color

   [reply this comment]

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