Have you guys seen this? If you’re cool, you probably have already since it was all over the internet yesterday.

It’s a new Cazwell single, predictably titled “I Saw Beyonce At Burger King,” released as a “viral video,” I am assuming, to try and get hype for his upcoming album Get Into It!

I really wanted to like it. Cazwell’s good looks (and kind of sexy crooked tooth?) make me think dirty thoughts, and it’s a proven fact that good looks can help make up for a lack of true musical talent. His first hit (if you can call it that, because it was probably only popular with urban gays), “All Over Your Face,” was catchy and fun, and the extras in the video are comprised of a large percentage of gay Williamsburg guys, many of whom company I enjoy the company of. But this new song is just annoying. Read More!

Remember the Cindi tumblelog we made? That was the fake life of a fictional hipster? The worst kind of hipster girl? Kyle’s been posting a lot of pictures and I occasionally post some text and we’re still keeping it up. But this morning I had a conversation that made me question whether it was parody… or actually a representation our real lives.

me: are you going to deerhoof tonight?
because EVERYONE’s going
Hannah: probably
hahahaha
me: hahaha
Hannah: i hate deerhoof
me: i assume cindi is over them but needs to make an appearance
HOW CAN YOU HATE DEERHOOF?!?!?!?!
OMG CINDI
Hannah: but i’m psyched on the idea of a experimental orchestra doing rites of spring
they are so dull
they are both precious and pretentious
me: haha, but they’re cute and fun
Hannah: i want to kill them
HOWEVER
me: i don’t think they’re pretentious at all
precious I’ll give you
Hannah: apparently the guitarist from xbxrx and the flying luttenbachers plays with them now
which is rad
me: HAHAHAHAHA
omg, I love it
Hannah: god i hate myself
me: you’re making me shit myself
Hannah: I AM NOT EVEN DOING IT ON PURPOSE
me: I KNOW
you’re the best at it
Hannah: BEST ON ACCIDENT
UGGGHHHHHHH
also i am so hungover i want to die
BECAUSE CINDI (read: ME) WENT TO BOTH ENIDS HAPPY HOURS LAST NIGHT

Fuck.

So I’m recently kind of obsessed with pretending to be the worst type of hipster ever and now this blog also. Perhaps my obsession is even bordering on pathological because I had to start a tumblr account for a fictional hipster named Cindi today to get it out of my system. Follow it and imagine she’s real and get endless laughs.

That being said I have a new game. Take a one of Jenny Holzer’s Truisms and replace a key noun with “hipster.”

• A lot of hipsters are crackpots
• A hipster means a lot just by itself
• A hipster can’t know what it is to be a mother
• A strong sense of hipster imprisons you
• Absolute hipster can be a form of freedom
• A relaxed hipster is not necesarily a better hipster
• Abuse of hipster comes as no surprise
• Hipster is just as dangerous as complacency
• At times your hipster is truer than you conscious mind
• Being hipster is more important than anything else

Endless hilarity guys.

So apparently people have been doing this sort of thing for a long time, as evidenced by the existence of the site Jowler, but I just learned about this over the weekend so I’m going to write about it like it’s news.

I threw a BBQ and we played a game called “Shakeface” where you make your face go slack, shake your head as hard as you can, and then take a photo. What you end up with is a picture that looks like what you could look like had you been born with some sort of serious retardation. It’s the best game because it is completely and totally headache inducing and pointless.
Below is my Shakeface.

More after the jump. Photos by good friend Kyle.

Read More!

Hey guys. Muxtapes, guys. Pretty cool. I made a mix last night.

The mix is pretty much my attempt to combine my obsession in recent years with lo-fi 90’s sounds with my undying love for emotional indie music. Check it.

More importantly is how much making a muxtape has renewed my love and passion for of copyleft and fair use movements. Read More!

So this weekend I got hit on on Friday by a 70 year old drunk woman? Because I put on “Crank Dat(Soulja Boy)” on the jukebox? We were busy playing jenga in the back, and of course I think it’s cool to put on bad music. Obviously I chose Soulja Boy because this video exists, and I have been obsessed with it for months.

This was last weekend. Why am I writing about a chance encounter in a bar with a 50 year old cougar all the way on Wednesday? Because I was reading my New Yorker today and figured out who this lady probably was from a profile in the March 31st issue by Amanda Fortini. Read More!

Ok. Before I get to the reason I am writing this post, I need to make a confession. Somehow, even after my last embarrassing Band of Horses dream, I had another one of those embarrassing hipster dreams. In this one, I was at a Guided By Voices concert, only instead of Robert Pollard, a very young David Byrne was the frontman. Also, the band was the band from Pavement. Instead of dancing around and standing up, David Byrne would only sit on the edge of the stage and sing with a single raised eyebrow.

Actually, this dream was more awesome than embarrassing. I’m actually bragging about what a cool mind I think I have right now.

But the point of the post is actually this. I got to write my first blog for our company blog today. You can find it here.The whole thing turned into a kind of a dry press release. Here’s the original intro to the entry after the jump. Read More!

Just find me a shotgun and let me pull the trigger. Band of Horses? In my dream? Seriously?

Seriously, me, seriously… this is like a bad cliché of a cliché of when a spacey girl uses her GPS to figure out how to drive to Marlow and Sons from Manhattan while Band of Horses is playing. Only in the version starring me, it’s Of Montreal singing about I need to go Outback Steakhouse and eat a Bloomin’ Onion.

(And before you ask or comment about it, yes, I use Twitter. I need about 50 gajillion things to do at a time or else my head will explode. It’s like my brain is Jason Statham in Crank, ok?)