Ok, so this advertisement just popped up in my FaceBook sidebar and I got all sorts of upset.
I am very attracted to the model in the photo as he is. He would be disgusting and look like he has allopecia if you laser off all his hair. Also, lasering off one’s beard is kind of fucking disgusting.
FaceBook. Please control your ads. This should not be targetted at me. I think the Hipster Grifter said it best when she got this tattoo:
It reads as “I love beards,” although some may read it as “I love Taliban” if, say, they have a more ingrained and racialized image of terrorism in their brains than I. Not sure which message Kari meant.
So in other news, I here FaceBook is the new manhunt.net. Discuss!
Check out the new music video for Grizzly Bear’s new song “Two Weeks” from their album released this week, Veckatimest. It’s pretty rad, I’m a huge fan of simple visual narratives in music videos and the song is really pretty. In internet speak, I would call this an “epic win.” I totally relate to this video, because last time I sat in a church pew my head exploded with light. In real life. Srsly.
I really want to learn how to acheive the “gothic kewpie doll” look. Should I hire this guy as my stylist?
Ok. So I know I haven’t written here in a while. And so much shit has happened. SO MUCH SHIT HAS HAPPENED!!!?!?!?!?! Just so ya’ll know, I’m gonna try and start updating again and have some more podcasts coming up for all 5 of you that actually download and listen to that shit.
Something important happened yesterday however, and as a gay, gay blog, I do need to at least pretend to cover it. California has upheld Proposition 8, Prop H8, or whatever you want to call it, in a 6-1 decision. You can download the full text of decision here if you have time to browse a over 100 pages of legal text. If I was a more intelligent person, I’d probably read the full decision and then offer some sort of nuanced point of view on how marriage equality could continue to move forward in California.
Unfortunately I don’t have that much time. But I do have enough time to read editorial features online!!!
Watch carefully as they sigh and roll their eyes, then whip out their Nokias to text their friends about how this creepy elder just tried to convince them that the harmless, yawningly commonplace homosexuality currently saturating the popular culture all around them, from fashion to Facebook, movies to “American Idol,” is not only wrong, but so wrong that the law should ban it forever because… well, no one really seems to know exactly why.
You could say, then, that we are, right this minute, at the tipping point. You could say that very soon indeed — sooner than many people expect, in fact — we will all look back on this inane gay marriage hysteria and wonder, what the hell was that all about? What the hell were we thinking? And by the way, isn’t President Obama’s second term going just astonishingly well?
Basically his opinion here is that “Gay marriage is a done deal,” regardless of the opposing legislation that might litter our path there. So all we need to do is like Jennifer Connelly at the end of Labrynth and say “You have no power over me” and then the right wing’s Escher inspired fortress will collapse and we’ll be back at home with our little brother (whom we thought was kidnapped!) and it will be like this whole bad dream never happened.
I guess the problem I have here is that I am part of this eye rolling, Nokia wielding, texting and sexting generation, albeit on the older side. However, I am defintively part of those known as “digital natives” and can safely say that I am on the older end of “Generation Y,” “The Millenials” or “Generation WTF,” you know, whatever you want to call it. And you know what? We’re not as liberal as people assume, there’s still a good number of close minded conservatives among generation Obama. Just because us young liberals currently have the spotlight doesn’t mean the pendulum couldn’t swing the other way.
I have difficulty taking any comfort in the idea that gay rights are part of an unavoidable zeitgeist or Hegelian march through history that will inevitabley end in equality and understanding for all. Gay marriage is far from “the last civil right,” especially when you examine trans issues, continued racism in our country, immigration, and as Andrew Sullivan points out in a powerful blog post regarding his personal life, discrimination against HIV positive people and serodischordant couples.
These are real families, and real people, living real lives, and this is what the fight for gay marriage needs to be about — real families and real people and how our government can create structures to support them the same way we support white heterosexual families in this country. The rights associated with gay marriage are actually about a whole lot more than gays getting married; these are rights that need more than people saying gay marriage is “cool” or “kinda chill” or “who cares” in order to come to fruition. It’s about families who have a need to be recognized by the federal government with full federal rights. The current solution we are fighting for is to create a more inclusive definition of marriage (just as a reminder — civil unions would be seperate and therefore per se would breed inequality).
Now that I am off my soapbox, I will admit his major points do have a good amount of merit. I mean even pre-pubescent vloggers on YouTube are cool with homosexuality these days:
Remember Deven Green? She was that hil-LAR-ious comedian from Vancouver BC that put up those classic parody pieces doing voice-overs on Brenda Dickson’s famous vanity project “Welcome to my Home.” She just did a piece for The Sword, a kind of more SFW off shoot of the porn site The Naked Sword.
So since the last podcast, we have been sent one picture. It was not a picture of someone spelling their name with piss, as we requested, but instead a beautiful picture of hog’s head cheese.
Our listener who submitted this says in his email:
I worked really hard to catch the reflection of the light on the smooth jelly surface. Gross, now my fingers smell like pig brain. Insert bad swine flu joke here.
Recently I was sent a recipe from this same dinner where I had lamb’s head cheese, from the blog of one of the chefs, Cath, who made this amazing carrot, curry ice cream. I’ll hopefully be giving this a go in the near future, as my good friends Keez and Eeez over at Steeez recently acquired an ice cream maker.
While hitting up Eeez on gchat to try and get permission to use the their ’scream maker, the topic changed to what our lives would be like if we were famous actor super models and all the disgusting things we would have to eat. Head cheese would never be on the menu… instead? Non-fat cottage cheese. Our conversation after the jump. Friendship cottage cheese is not my friend. Read More!
In this episode, my buddy Marlon, who writes at 1squared.blogspot.com, and I talk dirty on mother’s day. In this episode we discuss how my voice sounds really gay, body hair, the gay gangs of New York, how attractive we find Jesus, beards and body hair, body odor, how Marlon smells like onions, the death of Sparks, pissing in public, eels in the butt, 2girls1cup, lamb headcheese, and read from a Web site that profiles Flutter Ponies, discussing their individual merits…. among other things.
Playlist:
Beyonce – Dejavu
Marine Research – Queen B
Guided By Voices – As We Go Up We Go Down
Animal Collective – Prospect Hummer
Beck – O Maria
Crystal Castles vs Health – Crimewave
Belle and Sebastian – Your Cover’s Blown
Rolling Stones – Wild Horses
Lou Reed – New York Conversation
You can also listen via our Podomatic page… but I’m dumping this service soon since I haven’t been happy with it and will be porting the podcast to SoundCloud, which is way better.
If you’d like to be a guest on A Podcast in Crisis, message me here.
Remember when the Where The Wild Things Are that everyone was so exited about. Every blog was like, “OMG, it looks so good, we can’t make fun of it. This has awesome indie cred,” and all your friends were posting it to Facebook like somehow you wouldn’t have heard about it otherwise (you know, it’s not like it has millions of dollars in marketing backing it and working to create hype). Well a little while ago, that trailer and its popularity got its comeuppance in the form of brilliant parody. Not that it really deserved “comeuppance,” but when the trailer was released I basically had people shoving it up all my holes and am happy to see it made fun of.
Landline TV presents Spike Jonze’s new original movie, Everyone Poops.
Highlights:
The parents freaking out in the beginning
The talking toilet
The unicorn explaining to Amanda while looking at a creek bed “This is where poop goes.” Raw sewage anyone?
Triumphant self discovery at the end
The tagline “Inside all of is… poop.”
So many tiny details, like the dancing, it makes my head explode
For those who don’t know, Everyone Poops is a book, originally authored in Japan by Taro Gomi featuring amazing illustrations of animals demonstrating a basic law of being alive — what goes in must come out. Below you can see some tween with a dog and a stuffed Elmo doll read the book aloud, so that you can either relive your childhood potty training or regress to a toddler like state of wonder:
That being said I am still pretty excited to see Where The Wild Things Are, cliched indie tropes and all.
U know how sassy bitches be all up at the club, fu-haggin’ out and gettin’ down with e’rrybody just because of they sparklepower?
Neither do we. Because we spend our time a) hunting for manscruff, b) drinking beer that tastes like juice, and c) dreaming of finally leaving Park Slope for some place even dykier, like Portland or northeast Alabama. In fact, the last time we approached a twink was 2001, when, just after coming out, we followed our only gay friend, Matt (who, despite being in his late twenties and of Italian heritage, will forever resemble an underweight Puerto Rican adolescent, thus making him the King of Getting Ass), to Heaven because it was where homosexual males gathered (and glittery, orange freshmen piled into the *c*L*u*B* tighter than a nun’s vaginerr). Needless to say, it was a disaster, although it took about another nine months before we realized that we should probably avoid places that gave us panic attacks and made us want to hang ourselves from a mirrorball while Willa Ford hissed in the background.
So, naturally, we totally feel the hetero fellas at Titsburg, whose ideas about fairies with magical powers (and a vat of Boy Butter, probs) isn’t that far from the truth.
And, for the record, we’d totally make out with the “bear.”
Remember when we mentioned the Flutter Ponies? Well they are back and are showing their might, ready to take over the world. This shit’s worse than Independance Day.
All your little girls are the new Cylons; you can’t tell what side they are on so lock them all up.
WTF Marlon?!?!?! WTF!!!! Why did you send me this?!?!?!?!
However, the existence of this video did force me to ask a very important question. How is performance art changing with the advent of the internet? Is this just a tween crying out for attention?
OR
Could this be faked to make her look more “rolly polly” as the video titles it? I mean, somebody did make a fake, horrifying dildo video (NSFW!!!)… Is she making an important statement about body dysmorphia like Jenny Saville? Is this just the way that artists are transforming their work to keep up with current technology and social media?
Jenny Saville. Closed Contact #10, 1996.
It’s just so hard to believe in anything since the Internet started, guys.So I leave it up to you, give your response in this poll.
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