Cruisin' They Told 16-Year-Old Rocky Dennis He Could Never Be Like Everyone Else. Because He Was Ugly.

Posted on February 4th, 2008 by Colin
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You know what happens when society slowly starts to accept gays? My MySpace (oops! unnavoidable weird double possesive!) account inundates me with targetted ads for awful gay dating websites. Like the following:

Disgusting My Partner Ad

Why hello amorous Smith_Twin1984! You know what’s really effective, mypartner.com? Featuring the mentally handicapped and physically deformed in your ads for a dating site. Also… “If you can lift him”? Apparently he’s morbidly obese on his right side that is turned away from the camera. I’m surprised by your sorry existence but not surprised that people aren’t trying to lift you.

I can’t help but make the following comparison re: his face –

MASK 1985

Disclaimer: My condemnation of embarrassing gay dating websites is in no way a condemnation of my fellow writer’s desire to get a date.

No Fatties / Totes Transcendental Cleanse That Colon: Before and After

Posted on February 1st, 2008 by Elliott
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Forgive me, babies, for not finishing this earlier. It’s been a couple weeks now since the end of my cleanse. I’d have wrapped this up earlier, but I’ve been too busy macing people on the streets who try to jump me because I’m so goddamn skinny now. Perhaps you’d like to see some before and after photos?

Before:

Monique/Fat Elliott

See the exciting results of eating nothing for two weeks – after the jump!

Read More!

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