I’m not sure who Myles Cooper is and there’s very little on his MySpace music page. This is what I can quickly glean about this guy from the video:

• He lives in San Francisco and is some sort of gay hipster of sorts, evidenced most apparently by the Aunt Charlie’s shout out in the end. I had a pretty decent time at the Tube Steak party there once!!! Although going through the tenderloin at night is a tiny bit scary!!!
• He has some sort of association with ex-Gravy Train member Hunx, now of Hunx and his Punx, who sings in the chorus.
  

One thing that can be said with certainty is that the guy (with the help of animator Skye Thorstenson and a slew of other folks) has made one of the best, funniest, cutest, campy-yet-sincere music videos I have ever seen. Happy Friday, guys.

[tons of props to CTRL + W33D for posting this and bringing it to my attention]

To steal Seinfeld’s format for my opening here – what’s with this trend in Hollywood with making movies that look like they should be horrible that somehow turn out super enjoyable? First there was my experience with Beverly Hills Chihuahua. Now there is Hot Tub Time Machine. To get an idea of what an awful idea this movie at first seemed to be, check out the trailer below:

And boy was I proven wrong! I saw a preview with bloggy buddies Sorry I Missed Your Party and Hard Liquor, Soft Holes at the Regal on 42nd Street and 8th on Tuesday (the one next to the Dallas BBQ that I obvs hit up for a Texas Size Beer and a burger after wards). I actually laughed a lot and wasn’t totally bored/annoyed with the movie. AND THIS IS THE PART WHERE I ANNOUNCE SPOILER ALERT!

I like dude comedies for the most part. I like raunchy humor (although fart jokes can get a bit old) and I LOVE comedy created around despairing, depressed people who are kind of awesome but crushed by the world (because I kind of relate). My one big usual critique of dude comedies is that they normally circulate around straight male fantasies where everything around them must be subjugated to their will to find happiness. This is where the film surprised me, they introduce a satirical version of this ending with Rob Corddry’s character.

On top of that Rob Corddry just CRUSHES IT with his performance. He really carried the whole film for me.

His character plays a total alcoholic depressing fuck-up named Lou whose friends all ignore him and who MAYBE tries to commit suicide at the beginning (it’s never totally clear if it was just an accident that looked like suicide or if the bender he was on was intentionally self destructive). John Cusack, his nephew played by proto-Judah-Friedlander Clark Duke, and Craig Robinson take him on a retreat to a ski lodge where they had wild times when they were younger. Upon arrival, the place turns out to be falling apart, full of olds, and no longer a good times place, so they all get wasted in the hot tub. In a barely explained premise, some wacky Russian energy drink turns the hot tub into a time machine (the name of the movie does not lie!) that brings them back to the their youth. The rest of the exposition here doesn’t really matter enough for me to type out in detail.

The important thing is that what happens allows the future to change, because the guys, as their younger selves (always represented by their older selves on screen) change their past actions. The typical tension between loving the ‘good old party times’ and the ‘responsibilities of adult life’ arise. The men use their knowledge of the future to do things that will make their previous lives, which have such not-big-deal problems as unfaithful wives, difficulties dating and shitty jobs, into the lives they always wanted.

Two of the character’s endings are boring – but Rob Corrdy! Here’s where Rob Corddry’s character arc really makes the film work for me. His future, fantasy self has hair instead of growing bald, but it’s weird crazy Siegfriend and Roy Hair! He invents Google but names it Lougle (after his character’s name)! He just runs with it and creates this total parody of the normal straight-dude fantasy ending that is genuinely funny and critical at the same time!

Other things to note about the film:

• It is incredibly raunchy. Every body fluid get screen time. Blood, cum, vomit, piss, you name it.
• There’s a good amount of uncomfortable homoerotic moments.
• There is a time traveling squirrel that is actually kind of a funny running joke.
• Bad jokes about eighties trends really take a back seat to the raunchy humor. There’s really a lot less jokes about bad trends and fashions than I expected, which is GOOD because those jokes are pretty played out.
• John Cusack smokes bong rips, snorts coke, eats mushrooms and then dresses up like a crazy homeless lady on the Upper East Side (or maybe just old Edie from Grey Gardens?) and wanders around and it is soooo funny.
• Lizzy Caplan, known for her break out role as the goth girl in Mean Girls, plays Cusack’s love interest. I am a huge fan of hers from her work on the amazing Party Down (the best show hardly anyone watches) and while her role isn’t written very well (She’s kinda a cliché ‘free spirit who helps Cusack remember ‘how to live.’ Whatever, right?) I am really happy to see her getting work.
• Did I mention John Cusack takes tons of drugs and wanders around dressed in glasses that look like they were purchased on the street from st marks and some ragged but fancy looking fur jacket and scarf?

So good job Hot Tub Time Machine! You sure showed me not to judge a movie by a trailer!

Have you been watching the Winter Olympics? Johnny Weir was SO robbed right? He at least deserved bronze. And was there anything more beautiful than last night’s Canadian Ice Dancing team’s winning final performance. And they are both so cute!!!

I’m one of the rare people who is actually more into the Winter Olympics than the Summer Olympics. I mean come on. Figure Skating! Ice Dancing! Ski Jumps! Ski Cross! Snowboard Cross! There’s just so many weird sports.

This year I discovered a new weird sport to love. I legitimately am really into curling. I find it to be an exciting game of strategy. It’s a lot like watching a great game of pool at the bar, but more absurd, on ice, and utilizing actual giant stones. Also, what are their shoes? Because they don’t wear skates but they glide so gracefully.

And have you noticed? Strategies between women’s and men’s curling are super gendered! The women are super passive aggressive, putting one stone in the house (or, my preferred spelling, “the hoose”)  and then guarding the shit out of it. The men are more outwardly aggressive, knocking opponents stones or  just clearing the board when it stops going their way. It really makes me want to watch a co-ed game.

And more importantly, the game seems to be filled with secret crush worthy guys. Really, who had any idea that there were so many totally handsome men who were into curling?

For your viewing please, here’s a list of some of the most attractive men in curling I could find online. And of course I drew all over their pictures like a middle school girl in luuuuv!!!

[Look, I'm not even sure what some of my so-called innuendos I drew below are even supposed to mean. I just write this shit, ok?]

John Morris of Canada:

Thomas Ulsrud of Norway:

The dreamy stoner looking dude, Jason Smith, of the USA:

Jan Henri Ducroz of France:

The twinkalicious Oskar Erickson of Sweden:

The striking Raphael Mathieu of France:

And the very handsome and very fashionable (via the pants) Haavard Vad Petersson:

<3 these kewties <3

I was having this conversation with a buddy recent about the current state of music. We didn’t think the current climate was bad per se, but we couldn’t help but ask “WHERE IS THE ANGST?!!!” I mean, we’re in a depression, all our jobs suck, politics are more cynical than ever, and somehow most of popular culture still remains firmly rooted in a dedication to escapism. Why is our entertainment so seemingly happy when the rest of the world kind of sucks right now?

Well, it looks like Xiu Xiu’s upcoming album being released Monday, February 22, is aiming to provide some beautiful depressive catharsis. Xiu Xiu has consistently been one of the only bands I will shell out for whenever they come to town. The shows always have an amazing sense of live experimentation (For example, the last show I went to, they experimented with percussive tones using a yield sign placed on a saw horse). Jamie Stewart, the driving force behind the project, is magnetic on stage with an amazing ability to communicate on a personal level with large crowds. I was also always a big fan of Caralee, who unfortunately is now listed as a former member. (True story side note: I once went on a very unsuccessful date with a guy I met at one of their concerts!)

While the live performances have always been amazing, I always found some of their recording to be hit and miss. Sometimes the experimentation just doesn’t translate in recording. Don’t get me wrong. The most recent Women As Lovers was GREAT. Fabulous Muscles was a HUGE standby when I needed to emo out alone in my room in college. I actually can’t name an album I don’t like. I even liked the covers compilation released 3 years back. My point is more that I understand why people might NOT like it. Which is why these three leaked tracks from the upcoming Dear God, I Hate Myself have me really excited.

All three tracks go back to the sort of alternative electronic vibe that I first came to love about this band while adding in a kind of New Order 80s dance sensibility. Basically I have hopes that this could be one of the most accessible, successful, and listenable albums the group has done in a while. None of that is meant to sound patronizing, I think being “listenable” within this genre is actually a truly great quality.

I was looking at the YouTube comments to see what other people think. I think this mm60503642 has a good point but maybe doesn’t get the music?

However, I think I am more inclined to agree with VomitShovel.

Check out the title track “Dear God, I Hate Myself”:

Here’s another very dancey one called “Gray Death”:

And lastly my favorite of the leaked tracks, “Chocolate Makes You Happy.” You know, it’s just a simple song about binging on chocolate and then throwing it all up to try and make yourself feel better:

I still got some mp3 gift cards left over from Christmas that I know I will be using Monday.

I’m not joking. I really don’t know who Justin Bieber is and he seems to be a constant trending topic on Twitter and the like. Instead of Googling him, I figure it’s just better to write a post, right? Also, this video by some YouTube pop group named Menya is apparently a dirty cover version of one of his songs.

According to Joe My God these are all NYU freshmen? Having ‘been there’ (meaning having been an NYU freshman) I have some advice.

Letter number 1:

Dear unremarkable girl who is obviously the star,

Please get a new look. You have a great voice for autotune. You obviously like to perform. You can go far! You just need to refine your look a little, you’re being way overshadowed by your Asian friend’s obvious hipness. I know i can be hard to out-hip Asians with good haircuts, but you could at least try harder. Also you should talk to your friends in film school and get some lights and greeen screen. The video would be way better if you had b-roll backgrounds that made it look like you were flying over mountains or in a jungle or something.

You also look like you might fit in better in California than New York. That’s not an insult. I am just sayin’.

Sincerely -

A former unremarkable NYU Freshman

Letter number 2:

Dear girl who looks like Ginger Takahashi -

You are probably the best thing about this video. Keep up the good work. Are you in art school? If so your whole look and steez makes me thing of this awesome girl named Ginger Takahashi who is in some fun bands. One of them is called The Ballet but I don’t really know what they are doing anymore? The other is called Men and is with JD Samson of Le Tigre fame and they are playing tomorrow night at the Bell House.  You should go study her, because I am her fan and I want to be your fan too.

Best -

Former wanna be art kid

Letter number 3:

Dear really good looking but self conscious NYU otter cub -

Please learn to get into the dancing more. You are super cute and if you weren’t doing that ‘I am sooo self conscious so I look dead in the eyes’ thing every gay man in the east village and williamsburg would be sweatin you. You would have so many boyfriends. AND DON’T YOU WANT SOOOO MANY BOYFRIENDS????? (that’s rhetorical).

Best -

Former NYU Freshman who wants to have a crush on you

Thanks for uploading to YouTube Menya!!! Now please tell me who Justin Bieber is?

So I went to go see Valentine’s Day on Valentine’s Day. Buying a ticket for 1 adult online makes me laugh so hard at myself.

I should have shown up with a box of chocolates all for myself and then gone to a restaurant and yelled, “Excuse me! Waiter! I’ll be having the ‘Sweetheart’s Special’ for 1 please.”

True story though: I actually saw it with two of my besties and just bought the ticket by myself and we had juice boxes of pinot grigio. So in reality not as funny and actually kinda a normal experience!!!

But let’s talk about the movie.

I don’t want to do a full exegesis or review. I don’t think I can do better than Manohla Dargis’ brilliant take on the movie, describing the film as  a “dire romantic comedy.” And boy is this movie dire!!!

The film is just so full of anachronistic elements, so I am just gonna throw them all out there:

• The Taylor Swift/Taylor Lautner storyline has no real plot arch, but somehow is one of the best parts of the movie?
• Shirley MacLaine’s performance is the only thing that saves her storyline.
• Anne Hathaway/Topher Grace’s plot line is laughable. Anne Hathaway is in no way a convincing phone sex operator and I didn’t think for a second that Topher was actually pissed off or turned off by her chosen profession.
• Julia Roberts is in the movie for 6 minutes and it’s been reported she made 3 million dollars.
• Jessica Biel is WAY too hot (and her character dresses like she knows it) to be a believable dorky outsider.
• Patrick Dempsey juggles lemons to make a really obvious pun on how he’s cheating on his wife with Jennifer Garner.
• The gay “surprise” is pretty weird and involves a mystery man appearing to tickle Eric Dane’s face with flowers.
• A large part of the action takes place at an Indian Restaurant for no real reason.
• Ok, I almost cried at the end of Julia Robert’s plotline, when she shows up at home and hugs her kid.
• Queen Latifah, as always, was flawless. But can she please play a lesbian already?

So, if you liked In Her Shoes and weren’t bothered by the random Jamaican Wedding at the end, you will probably love this movie! That being said, it’s entirely “sit through-able.” I didn’t once feel like it was totally unwatchable. If you decide to watch this, just make sure you have a box of wine nearby.

2010 guys! It’s been a month! Can you believe it? I’m sure you can!

I have have been sick with a horrible hacking cough so hence small hiatus from this here personal blog. Be back when I’m back on my game.

But I saw this today and ya’ll just need to know about it. I been watching this ‘like a hawk in the sky, a bird of prey’ aka on repeat.

His music has strong powers. First I was like, “hey look a goofy looking white dude” but by the end of the video I was kinda in <3. Maybe for 2010 I should get married to this guy.

[via w33d]

I had this boyfriend half a decade ago who once said that Ginch Gonch was the gayest underwear. I personally think that 2(x)ist is way gayer. Like, 2(x)ist the the bartender at XL in Chelsea (’member XL?) who can’t stop talking about how he can relate to the character Samantha on Sex in the City but thinks that in reality he’s just a lot more like Carrie. That’s how gay 2(x)ist is. But my attraction to this new line I recently saw might mean that if 2(x)ist is XL (a gay bar I always hated), then Ginch Gonch is like The Boiler Room (a gay bar I sometimes find fun).

Behold, Pacific Northwest Indian art themed briefs:

Maybe my attraction to these is because I grew up in the pacNOdubs (aka PNW aka Pacific Northwest) but I really would love to be able to sport some pacNOdubs steez when some dude is trying to get my pants off. I mean, who doesn’t want people to equate the awful power of Thunderbird with their croth? And seriously, would anyone other than a total art fag wear something like this? I have difficulty believing these were designed for guys stuck on ‘the res’ as a way to express their heritage through fashion.

That being said, my birthday is in a week and I totally totally want the bear ones below. You can buy them on Ginch Gonch’s online store here. Thx in advance!!!

Know what’s awesome? When you stumble across that totally priceless vlog that is super cool and only has a couple hundred views if that. It’s like finding that little gem of self expression catapulting all sorts of feelings into space just waiting for people to listen.

Well, here’s one and it’s worth a watch. This guy has some emoting to do about being a femme top. PREACH, SISTAH! AND DO IT IN SONG!

Femme tops want ur sex!!!!

JOHNNY WEIR IS GOING TO BE IN THE UPCOMING WINTER OLYMPICS AND I AM SOOO EXCITED!!!1!11!!!

(To me this is important news, but like for those of you that would like to spend your time helping Haiti instead of freaking out over Johnny Weir, you can donate to Doctors Without Borders here)

Remember when he did his routine to Tori Amos’ “Winter”? Well it looks like he’s really gonna be even more amazing next time he skates for the world.

Can we all talk for a second about how great Johnny Weir is? He recently did this amazing interview with ESPN where he basically blew the poor sports reporter Jim Caple’s head wide open.

You can read the full piece for yourself, but I can’t help but pull some seriously choice quotes. This man is a velvet goldmine of beautiful quotables filled with sass, sequins, and graceful sashays.

On his people liking his short program outfit:

That’s for the short program. It’s black and hot pink. And it’s like an oily, black corset with pink cords and this big pink ruffle and then like a black porno leather epaulet that comes out to here and a big pink tassel that comes off of it. People like it.

On developing his long form outfit:

I’m portraying the Fallen Angel, and before, it was this big, white wing coming across my body, and lots of rhinestones and sparkles and way too much. And I had these gorgeous, chalk-colored ribs. I really liked it, but when I saw some pictures and videos of it, it made me look wide because of the white, so I’m changing it. And now my inspiration is sort of — you know when the seagulls get stuck in the oil spills on your side of the world, up in Alaska and whatnot? When those really pretty white feathers get in the oil just on the tips? That’s kind of the inspiration, and we’re building it now, but it’s the very starting stages.

Why a fallen angel, Johnny?

One moment everything will be peachy and everyone will be saying the nicest things about me and loving me, and the next minute I’m the worst, I’m evil, all these things. It’s like a fallen angel. For me, I feel very much that I can portray that character. Because it’s my career and my life.

On dieting:

while trying to cut down from 132½ to 130½ pounds for nationals, he says, he merely “looks” at lunch

On being named a D-list celebrity (even if he is A-list in my book):

Great, I’m Kathy Griffin.

On the cultural relativity of masculine aesthetics (You’re such a smarty pants, <3 u!!!z):

For me, I’m lucky that I’ve traveled so much of the world and seen so many things and for me, masculinity is completely subjective,” Weir says. “Here, a male ballet dancer would get beat up and left on the side of the road. But in Russia, he is No. 1, he is what a man is. That kind of passion and control. In Japan, masculinity is making sure your hair is completely gelled and coiffed and that you’re dressed and decked to the nines. Masculinity is what you make it out to be. Here in the U.S., not everyone feels the same way.

His mother, on the circus like media attention Weir gets:

They had a fit over Weir in track pants, and here is Evan all but naked, jumping around and leaving nothing to the imagination,” she says. “How come you’re fine with this but go off on my son for wearing track pants? Granted, he was wearing heels.

Weir on the kind of glass closet he seems to live in:

I want to be judged by who I am, not what I am. I mean, I am Johnny Weir. Judge me the way you see me, love me the way you see me, hate me the way you see me. All these things make me up, and sexuality and having sex is the least that people should worry about.

My favorite little byte is that they mention that the commercial for his upcoming reality show is one where “he hatches from a giant Fabergé egg”? WHAT?

This show is gonna be amazing.

I know some so called progressive gays are gonna come down on him for “perpetuating stereotypes” or whatever that shit means. Look, part of equal rights is equal rights and respect for even the most flamboyant. So the haters need to shit the fuck up. This man is amazing, funny, and a great addition to what we see in the media. I personally can’t wait until the day comes that he finally feels comfortable calling himself gay publicly. Creating an environment that can be supportive of that is what we need to work on, not tearing him down in all his spandex glory.